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Monthly Joke

joke of the month from EUROTAS 2017

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A Prayer for the Day

Dear God, so far today, I’ve done all right! I haven’t gossiped, and I haven’t lost my temper. I haven’t been grumpy, nasty or selfish, and I’m really glad of that. But in a few minutes, God, I’m going to get out of bed, and from then on, I’m probably going to need a lot of help. Thank you!  Amen.

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Orangutan

One day the zoo-keeper noticed that the orangutan was reading two books – the Bible and Darwin’s Origin of Species. Surprised, he asked the ape, “Why are you reading both those books?” “Well”, said the orangutan, “I just wanted to know if I was my brother’s keeper or my keeper’s brother”.

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Joke September

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Every day, a physicist.

Every day, a physicist goes to an ice cream parlor and buys two ice creams, one for himself, the other one; he places to the seat next to him. After several months, the owner of the ice cream parlor asks the man why he does this. The man replied, “According to quantum mechanics, a beautiful woman will spontaneously materialize in ...

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What’s the difference

What’s the difference between a psychiatrist and a psychologist? If you say, ‘I hate my mother’, a psychiatrist will ask, ‘Why do you say that?’, whereas a psychologist will say, ‘Thank you for sharing that with us’.

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Board Meeting

“There will be a meeting of the Board immediately after the service,” announced Reverend Morris. After the close of the service, the group gathered at the back of the church for the announced meeting. However, there was a stranger in their midst. He was a visitor who had never attended their church before. “My friend,” asked Reverend Morris, “did you ...

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Adam and Eve

Adam bit the apple and, feeling great shame, covered himself with a fig leaf. Eve, too, felt shame and covered herself with a fig leaf. Then she went behind the bush to try on a maple leaf, a chestnut, and an oak.

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Joke of april 2017

Patient: „Doctor, my wife thinks I‘m crazy because I like sausages.” Psychiatrist: “Nonsense! I like sausages too.” Patient: “Good, you should come and see my collection. I’ve got hundreds of  them!”

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After 12 years

„After 12 years of psychoanalysis, my psychotherapist said something that brought tears to my eyes“. “What did he say”? “No hablo ingles”.

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